Monthly Archives: October 2008

Oh my!

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, “I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!”

“IMPOSSIBLE!” said the groom broom.

“WE HAVEN’T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!”

A Scary Story

A man was walking home alone, late one foggy night, when behind him he hears a noise.

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

Walking quickly, he looks back and through the fog he makes out an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street behind him.

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing faster behind him.

FASTER!

FASTER!

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, and then slams and locks the door behind him.

Suddenly, the casket crashes through his front door, with the lid of the casket clapping.

Clappitty-BUMP!

Clappitty-BUMP!

Clappitty-BUMP!

Spinning around on his heals, the terrified man runs again.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the bathroom door.

Bumping and clapping toward him.

The man screams and reaches for something, anything. But all he has within reach is a bottle of cough syrup!

Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket and…

.

.

.

.

The coffin stops.

A Chilling Tale

Once upon a time, there was a little ghost who wanted to go out haunting for Halloween, but he didn’t have anything to wear. So he went to all of the other ghosts to see if he could borrow a costume, but he had to stay home…

because nobody gave a sheet.

You know you love me. ❤

A week? Already?!

I’m back and survived a busy week. Some highlights include:

Creating a cake for 70 person baby shower, messed up several times by  made with help from Cliff the cat. Seven cakes were baked, cookies were made out of the cake that crumbled, three batches of icing were made, and about three pounds of fondant were made and used. Decorating took a little over four and a half hours. The results were awesome, though.

Two evenings spent searching for pink rubber ducks for said cake. The cake was a rubber duck/bathtime theme and there was no doing without.

Two piles of feathers and half a beak found in the downstairs hallway, leading me to believe that a bird had snuck in and succombed to a tragic fate. Strangely, however, the rest of the feathers (down and some outer), the bones, and the feet have yet to be found. I have no idea when, where, or how the bird got in, either.

One of my uncarved pumpkins was stolen off of the porch. Not smashed like a Halloween prank, but stolen like a crime. That’s the second time in as many weeks I’ve had to chat with the cops.

The Panleukopenia breakout at the shelter seems to be under control and so far, hasn’t made it to the offsite locations. (*keeping fingers crossed*). Having the virus there, however, has made it very important for foster homes to take cats in. I took in a momcat and three kittens, in addition to the foster I had already. Momcat is doing most of the work, unlike last time. They’re absolutely adorable.

My watch is missing in action. I know I had it at work Thursday night at 8:30 and didn’t have it at work Friday. I feel so disoriented without it.

I have another order for Halloween – two dozen cupcakes and eight dozen kitty treats – that needs to be finished Wednesday night for a Thursday before work dropoff. The Howl-o-ween party is Friday, 2pm-5pm, if anyone is interested in going. There’s a costume contest and bake sale, among other things. Unfortunately, I won’t be there.

Irritating cube neighbor, loudly talking on the phone:  " blah blah blah blah blah *ten minutes pass* blah blah blah ate enough and had a snakebite balh blah blah blah.."

Me:  "Heh.  Yeah I WISH you’d get bitten by a snake…"

I need a vacation.